Wow...it's been a while

I just saw that I haven't blogged since November!! Yikes. I guess I've been busy. Doing photo shoots and school, raising a couple kids and a husband....life all around me. So Quinn has 6 teeth--4 on top and 2 on bottom. He loves food and anything else he can put in his mouth when I am not looking. I've found things from dog food to tape in his mouth. I have to watch him like a hawk. It's great really. He is very close to full crawling..he gets himself around by scooting himself or crawling backwards, lol. He's also trying to pull himself up to a stand and very close to doing it. He wears 12 month and can even fit some 18 month stuff. He is going through that attachment thing..if I leave the room he freaks. Or if he sees me walk by, he wants me immediately. It's hard to get anything done..so I just bring him with me wherever I need to do work. If I'm sitting, he will play as long as he can see me and I pick him up and cuddle every once in a while. I think Grandma is his choice for being put down for a nap and I think she likes it too, lol. He loves banging things on things. So no more cell phone holding for him. I need to get him a play wooden drum or something, he would love it. He is going to be 1 in 3 months!!

And for Rayne...she will be 6 in a couple of months and I think she thinks she is a grown up already who should get to stay up as late, etc. Still battling with her eczema now and then but it doesn't seem to be giving her too much grief. Quinn had a reaction to egg yolk...so no more egg for him. Makes me wonder if Rayne has food allergies too. I hate allergies. Rayne is still doing homeschool and I think she likes it. She's getting better at writing her letters and is writing sight words which will help her start to sound words out. She is really good at math and I think she likes it. Weird. I never did. Math annoyed me for the most part, lol.

I've had some photo shoots which have been fun for the most part. I now know that I do not want to do big families or weddings for now. I just like photographing babies and kids and maternity. When Quinn is older I will take on birthing photo sessions too. I may do one in June for someone I know who is due then. I got to do twins which was fun. I'm excited to upgrade my gear with tax return. Thinking of getting a full frame! THAT would be cool. If I did that, I'd be set for a long time. Then I would just increase my lenses.

I guess that's it for now..Quinn is fussing at me. Ta ta for now

Yep...still teething

And I can see one of the top teeth just below the skin. It should pop through any time now. I'm wondering how the next few days/nights are going to go. Hopefully not too bad. Both kids are doing pretty good. Rayne is coughing more again. Not sure why..I guess still from a cold she fought off last week. She was coughing a lot again last night. A really wet cough too. Ugh. I'm so tired of hearing her cough..I wish she could just get a break from it already. It's been 6 months since whooping cough now. I don't have too much to report these days. We are leaving to Florence, Oregon (well..me and the kids are) next Sunday and will be gone a week. I have more photo shoots lined up which I am really excited about. Well, that's it for now. Ta ta.

Quinn is teething again

Good luck getting a blog from me right now. (please save me)

So it's all about the pull tabs.

First, about the title. So I had to get groceries today..my favorite chore in the wide world (not). I went to 3 different stores and the last one was WalMart..my least favorite of the 3. We are in the checkout and I had Esme with us...the girls were really good all day and they were bugging me for a new play cell phone because they had tinkerbell. They just saw the new tinkerbell movie so they are all about tinkerbell right now. ANYWAY, so I cave and say okay and they hand the lady their phone. Well the nice lady in the line told them they should make sure the phones have the battery tab in them so they know they are fresh batteries and will last longer. Thanks nice lady! So then they had to search all over the checkout lines on either side of us in search of 2 tinkerbell phones with the tab. At first they found one. That will not do. There HAD to be 2 of them. Thanks again lady, really. So they FINALLY found another one with a tab. WHEW. I wanted to give one of those big fake thank you smiles to the lady. But I didn't. I know it was true, they would be guaranteed to be fresh, but COME ON. They are toys and I needed to get home, it was getting late and there were TWO of them! That could have been very ugly. Thankfully it was not. Not TOO much so. On another note..I think Quinn is trying to get his top teeth now. He's been more cranky and drooly. He was up a lot in the wee hours of the morning just thrashing and fussing and not needing anything in particular but a pat and shush. I was really tired this morning so I came out..plopped him on the floor (gently of course) put his basket of toys next to him, told Dave why and said a goodnight to all of them for an hour. So besides that and groceries and making dinner...that was all that was accomplished today. I can't get used to these shorter days and especially on Friday which is a prep day for me for the Sabbath. It comes way too soon...I don't have enough time to get ready. OH well. Life goes on. I guess that's all for now..Quinn is fussing again. Later!

Ahhhhhhhh

Rayne is spending the night at Grandma and Grandpa's. Quinn is asleep. Need I say more? It's quiet in here. Dave is on his way home and apparently we are going to watch a movie online tonight. I haven't seen a movie in months, at least. I'm surprised I still know how to spell it. Quinn now has 2 teeth and when he gets mad, he spits. Isn't that lovely? Seriously, he starts going thbthbhththbhthbhthbth and the spit just pours out of his mouth and his face gets all red. He will soak the top of his shirt if I can't get to him right away. He's 7 months old. Not 1, not 2, 7 MONTHS. Help me now. His little personality is just blooming. He cracks us up a lot. He started making this little fish face too. No reason, just to do it. No crawling yet. I think I'm okay with that. I had a vision. Quinn crawling. To me. Wanting up. And nothing else. He is so much a mama's boy...if he sees me, he reaches out for me immediately. It's cute and I love it, but sometimes, I just want a break from holding him so much. My tendinitis is acting up. Ever had someone stab a needle filled with burning hot liquid into your arm? Me neither, but that's what it feels like when I get the pain in my arm. As of right now I am getting an A in my first real Master's class. Hopefully it remains after our final paper is graded. Oy, I'm tired so signing off. Kids are great, we are hangin in, goodnight.

Did I already say Argh?

Well I really mean it. Argh. Another one of those days. Nothing too major, but enough small things to add up and make me exhausted. I guess I should expect that from a Friday. They are always crazy and whirlwindish. Is that a word? Apparently not since it is underlined in red right now. Well, I think it should be a word. Anyway...Quinn started saying Ga Ga. Seriously, ga ga..just as babies should be saying right...ga ga goo goo? It's funny and he thinks so too. He says it and then smiles really big like he would say.."did you hear that? aren't I cool?". It cracked me up. I think Rayne has been feeling the effects of Dave working overtime. She had a bit of a rough week with her behavior and just not being real settled or happy. She misses her Daddy. They are like peas in a pod those two. I did manage to do more school with her this week. I have to call about getting a Math assessment set up for her. Oh the joy. She's 5 and they want to assess her math skills. Whatever. I don't like assessments, can you tell? I got to do another fun photo shoot with a friend's kids in the fall leaves...actually, several friends' kids. They are of course on my flickr account. I like how they turned out. I cannot wait to upgrade my gear. Should be in about 3 months or so. I am hoping the biz takes off soon. We could really use the added income. I need to advertise more. I have a good friend building a website for me (thanks Emeth!) and I think she said she's going to do the biz cards too. I'm excited about it. I will be a .com :) The site is www.shilowe.com How cool is that? I had no idea photography would become such a passion for me, but it is and I absolutely LOVE LOVE it. I would take pics all day if I could. Some day I want to travel and just take pics of my travels. It would be a blast. I think the kids would like it too. We could go around and just do educational stuff and they could see their country. I hope to make that dream come true someday. They will probably be my little protege's with their own DSLR. Or at least a really good point and shoot. Well, I know I haven't done biography in a while, but I've just been too tired and then I won't remember the details. I'll have to try and do it again soon, after Quinn is sleeping better again. He's been doing the whole nursing every hour thing again. It's really tiring. So that's it for tonight. Bye all!

Argh

Rayne today....argh. She has been testing me again. TO THE MAX. I am feeling very burnt right now. It's just not stop arguing or flat out disobeying again. It wears me out after awhile. I was in with Quinn trying to put him to sleep tonight and I told Rayne she could play on the computer for a little bit while I put him down, then it's time for her to go to bed. So I'm in there with Quinn and I hear her start banging on my computer. So I go out there quickly, which of course disrupted Quinn in his almost sleeping stupor, and shut the computer and told her she was now done because she knows better than to do that. I also told her to get to bed. She says, NOOOOO. And my teeth get ground down a bit more...and tell her to go to bed NOW. She continues to whine and argue and start throwing a fit..so I tell her however many times I have to tell her to get to bed, that's how many things she loses. So she finally went to bed (not without whining about being "hungry" of course). She is always magically starving when it's bed time...or thirsty or both. Now most of you know how slim Rayne is and I really hate denying her food when she is really hungry, so I offer her a couple of choices and of course it's never what she wants..that's how I know she's not REALLY hungry, she is just munchy because she doesn't want to go to bed. (side note here...I HATE that commercial for Clorox wipes that has the little boy plopping the meatball into the sauce from up high, which of course splatters the sauce everywhere, and says it's okay to make messes because their wipes are so strong..blah blah blah. HATE it. It was just on.) So she decides she doesn't want to lose anything and lays in bed and asleep within 10 minutes. Imagine that. I went back in with a hysterical Quinn once she was in her room and he too was asleep about 10 minutes later. FINALLY. I was then able to get online and do some schoolwork (oh so fun) and do some updating here and there on certain sites. I opened an Etsy shop. Selling photographs. It's a site that sells anything handmade. Pretty cool site, everyone should check it out. http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=6378613 I need a massage. That is all.

Wow and Double WOW

We had an awesome time at the Feast. Seaside had some really nice weather which was such a blessing for that time of year. We had sunsets on the beach too! I was so excited. And the evening we decided to do Canon Beach it was clear and a GORGEOUS sunset. You can see all the pics at flickr. I'll also post some on here gradually. Rayne had a lot of fun. AND......drum roll.......Quinn go this first tooth at the Feast! It finally broke through and we were all so excited. He slept really well there too. The bed we had in the house we rented was SO comfortable. I wish we had that bed. So the little man is growing up. Now he has a tooth. Soon there will be two and then he will be crawling and on and on..sigh. We went to the Maritime Museum in Astoria and Rayne got to go down inside a very large retired boat. She watched a movie about rescue boats and loved it and told me all about it very adamantly. We also went to the aquarium in Newport and she loved that too. Got to "pet" a starfish. She wants a pet turtle too. She also got to ride the carousel at the Carousel Mall near where we had Church and she LOVED LOVED that. She loves those things. She also got lots of presents and had fun playing with her new friends. Oh and she sang in the Children's choir and had fun doing that. As you can tell, we were very busy and had a lot of fun. We also went to the Cheese factory and sampled Tillamook cheese and got an ice cream. The Seaside, Oregon boardwalk had swings right on the beach so her and Quinn got to swing on the beach facing the Ocean which was neat. Seaside, Oregon is actually a really fun place to go. I would love to go back someday. There are tons of little shops and a boardwalk and "things" to do to keep busy. Canon beach was my favorite, I've wanted to get sunset pictures there FOREVER. Now I finally have some and I love how they came out. Kipper (our dog) went to my brother in law's and had a lot of fun with his roommates dog and cat. So all around it was a good time for everyone. Now we are home and getting back to the grind as they say. More to report later, too tired now.

One Week and counting...

One more week until we go to the Feast in Seaside, Oregon. I really really hope we have some nice weather and that no one gets sick or hurt. I am PRAYING that this is the case. Rayne had another treatment, for vitamin B. Her next one is this Friday and it's for Grain Mix which could be a big culprit of the eczema. That would be nice to nip that in the buuuud. I want to do the same treatment as soon as we can afford it. Who knows what I have sensitivities to. I think Dave should do it too. Eventually I will get Quinn done too. He is liking his food. He LOVES peas. And he seemed to like apples more today. He didn't care for banana when I tried it the other day. Go figure. I have had a headache all day today that just keeps holding on. I hate that. It's hormonal. I hate that too. Rayne spent all day at her cousins house today and it was weird not having her here. There was a void. I think Quinn missed her too because he was a bit cranky today. But I did get some video of him laughing really hard. It's a must see. Here's the link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9c36m5yhwc
BE WARNED..your tummy will probably hurt from laughing when you watch this! I think I'll end on that note. Night!

It's OCTOBER!!

I can't believe how fast the months go by and here it is October. We leave soon on our trip to Seaside, Oregon for the Feast of Tabernacles. I hope the weather is decent while we are there. Rayne can straighten her arm all the way and now just has to work on being able to bend it closed all the way. It's MUCH better. She's still dealing with really dry skin where the Splint was, but hopefully that will go away soon too. Rayne also started NAET treatments. It's a holistic treatment of her allergies. It's at a Bio Energetics place and so far we found out that she is sensitive to Vitamin C, B Complex, Mineral Mix, Grain Mix, Food coloring and additives. She was treated for Vitamin C at her first appt. and now will be treated for B Complex tomorrow. That's all we can do until after the Feast. The woman who is treating her has seen many children be treated for serious allergies like peanuts. They went from being deathly allergic to being able to have them. She witnessed it in her office. So we have a lot of hope for this place and pray that it will take care of Rayne's allergies. Quinlan is officially sitting up. I still put a pillow behind him, even though when he does fall over he manages to fall to one side or the other instead of straight back. He loves sitting and playing for a little while. It's very cute. We went to a pumpkin patch and they had a scale so I put him on it and he weighs 19 lbs according to the scale. Little chunk. We had a very busy week. Sunday was Heritage days at a park, Tuesday was a Holy Day and Wednesday was the Pumpkin patch. Today I had a photo shoot with a 3 week old little girl. She was really cute and a little trooper through all of the outfit changes. And now it's almost Friday and the week is over. WHEW! Oh and we squeezed in homeschooling and my school and the household chores in there somewhere. Now that I read that, I'm exhausted!! Goodnight!

The picture is from the photo shoot tonight...Sophie.

They're OUT!!!

YAY! The pins are out and prayers were answered because they came out smooth as buttah...the doc and nurse were both really shocked that she didn't even flinch and he didn't have to pull very hard. It took him less than a minute to get both out. She's using her arm more, but still can't straighten it all the way. She's trying though all the time. Hopefully it will just take a little more time for everything to stretch back out. She was such a trooper though. On the baby front..Quinn is now sitting up. He still topples forward or backward at times, but for the most part, I can put him down to play and place pillows strategically and walk away, while checking on him all the time of course. I can usually hear when he has toppled...he doesn't like it. Not close to crawling yet, which suits me just fine for now. It's nice that he can play a bit now...less holding required. My arms was hurting a lot from holding him so much (whew). He's still a little chunk, very solid. We all just got over colds and he got a cough again, but he seems to be getting better now. Still no teeth either. I think I will start giving him avocado at the Feast (mid October). See how he likes it and how he does. He looks at food and wants to grab it all the time. He has tried to grab whatever I'm eating from me before, lol. I'm only going to do avocado and carrots at first for a while. No fruit probably until he's a year..don't want him to get that sweet taste and then not want anything else. We'll see though. He's a little chatter box....blabbity blab blab all day long. And I just adore his big hearty laugh. Rayne can still get him laughing pretty good. I'm still doing school, about to finish my first class next week and then on to the next one. I stay pretty busy I guess you could say. Rayne is doing well in homeschooling and has shown a lot of improvement in her letter and number recognition and writing. She's doing well in other areas too. It's fun to watch her learn. Especially when she isn't getting frustrated and then angry and then wanting to throw something or quit just because she doesn't get it right away...not that that happens EVER. yeah right.

And NOW


the all suspenseful........BIO.......

Nice lead in eh? Okay, so I left off at the wacko I was working for by being a Nanny to her 2 beautiful children that are now grown and hopefully not screwed up by their Mother. Wow, they are now grown. That's depressing.................................................................................................................................................anyway! So yeah, I continued working for her and just making sure I wasn't around any more than needed and NEVER brought that psycho stuff up again. While I was working there during the day, I decided I needed more cash flow and got a job at The Nashville Palace. THAT was an awesome place to work. I had so much there. I started out as a hostess which sounds easy, but I can tell you WAS NOT. It was a job of strategic and careful planning so as not to tick the waiters and waitresses off. Everyone wanted to make sure they got the same amount of tables and the others. These people made some bucks, let me tell ya. We often had some wealthy folks eating there. Mostly tourists, but sometimes local biggies. There was one "famous" person that was always in the bar...and I mean ALWAYS...like daily and all day long. That little guy that always wore the crazy cowboy hats and outlandish outfits..remember him? I think Johnny something? I can't remember his name, but he used to be on TV a lot in country music. He was there just about everyday. The best part of the job was on Wednesday nights it was employee night and if you sang (which come on..everyone there was trying to make it big) you got to get up on stage and sing with the band (and they were good). It was SOOOO much fun. It was a huge stage and a very large attentive audience. And it was a contest at the same time I believe. I could be wrong, my memory fails me at times. Anyway, I didn't care about that..I was always hoping for that producer that just loved what I sang and approached me with a deal. Of course, far fetched, but everyone there was hoping for the same thing. One guy I worked with has been in several Country Music Videos. Including a Carrie Underwood one. It was cool seeing him on TV...obviously still sticking it out and trying to make it. He was a pretty good singer. I always thought he was gay, not sure though. He made a lot of money as a waiter there. So from hostess I moved onto Cashier. Again, not the "typical" cashier you think of. I had a little booth and I was responsible for cashing out all the customers through the waiters and then figuring out the tourist groups final bill (no small feat). THEN at the end of the night, I had to make the books balance, do a credit card batch and go in the back and count. Sometimes the books would be off by $20 or so and it would take an hour or MORE to figure out how and why. It was usually because I had to take a break and one of the waitstaff had to do be cashier and it ALWAYS got screwed up. So I finally convinced management that ONLY I could be in there. And if there was anyone else in there, they had to stay with me to close books. Of course nobody wanted to do this, so they agreed, if I had to take a quick potty break...they waited patiently. The end of the night till could be $10,000 easily or more. No joke. The tourist groups final bill could easily be 2-3,000 depending on how large. This included all 50-100 of them to eat, drink and watch the show. It was crazy. But it was SO much fun. Everyone there was fun to work with and the show was always good. There seemed to something exciting going on all the time. One time Alan Jackson did a Satellite show from there and they shut the WHOLE place down. Only employees were allowed in and I was scheduled to work. I got to go in the back and talk with his fiddler and it was SO cool. He sang and then answered questions live from fans. It was really cool. Back then I SOOOOO wanted to be a country music singer..well known of course. I wanted it all. Or so I thought. On almost my last day of Nannying the girls (it was a summer gig only) I got really sick. I didn't know what happened, but after me and the EXboyfriend went singing, we went back to his Aunt's house, where he was staying and stood to get up and doubled over in pain. I thought..man I must have ate something and now I have REALLY bad gas pains or intestinal trouble. So I kept trying to go the bathroom. But nothing helped and it wouldn't go away. So the EX said not to try and drive all the way back to where I was living (it was like 30 minutes away or so) and to sleep on their couch so he could keep an eye on me. He crashed on the floor by the couch. I couldn't sleep and kept tossing and turning, taking gas pills, antacids, trying to go to the bathroom countless times and nothing helped. It kept getting worse and worse. It was HORRIBLE. By early early morning I knew something was very very wrong and it wasn't just something I ate. We all thought appendix. By then his Aunt and Uncle were up and we told them what was going on and how much pain I was in and it was my right side and they were really worried it was my appendix and that I needed to get to the hospital asap. So in the car we went and it was about 20-25 minutes to the closest hospital. Not including traffic. Thankfully it was early enough and there wasn't too much traffic. I kept getting worse and worse on the way there and he kept slowing down when he saw a cop and I was hollering DON'T SLOW DOWN..if they pull us over GREAT...I thought I wasn't going to make it if he didn't get there soon. My chest started hurting too by this point. That's the only part of getting there I remember...telling to stop slowing down! So we finally make it and he ran in and got a wheelchair cuz by then I couldn't walk and wheeled me into ER. We all know how fast they are in ER's. It seemed to take FOREVER. I was finally seen and could barely talk by then I was in so much pain. I hadn't ever felt pain like that up to that point. It was in my chest, it seemed it was everywhere. So they make me get up and go into another room and a doc does a pelvic on me. Oh my...that hurt so much I think I screamed. Of course he couldn't tell what was going on, but he could tell it wasn't good. I really don't remember too many details from that point on. I think they must have xrayed me, although I can't remember them doing so. They came back in and said that I had internal bleeding and it was likely from a cyst on my ovary that ruptured. So I would need surgery soon. I panicked. Flipped out panicked and scared. I asked for a minister to come annoint me before surgery so we got on the phone and made some calls. I had to call my parents who were 2000 miles away and tell them what was going on..I'm sure that was a lovely call to receive. By the time it was time to go to surgery my whole upper body was convulsing...like my chest would contract and my arms would move, involuntarily. It was awful. I think I had as much morphine as they could give me and it wasn't helping. Then all of a sudden a rush of docs and nurses come in and tell me they can't wait any longer for the minister to get there, my blood pressure had just dropped dramatically and they had to go in NOW. More panick and freaking out. But I couldn't cry because it hurt too much to do so. So off I am wheeled and really scared. Right when they got me there and started to wheel me in to pre-op, the minister came rushing in and was able to quickly annoint me. I went in feeling much better about having been annointed and they told me to count back from 100..I think I got to 98 and that's all I remember until they woke me in recovery. It was SOOO hard to come out of that stuff. I was SOOO sleepy. I didn't want to wake up....I remember I kept trying to open my eyes and the nurse kept telling me over and over again to wake up, open my eyes and it was SOO hard. She seemed to be getting mad at me for not staying awake, but I didn't care. When I was put into a regular room the doc came in and told me the deal. Apparently, I had a cyst rupture on my right ovary that caused a tiny little tear in my ovary. It didn't clot and therefore just kept bleeding and bleeding, filling my entire cavity with blood. Thus the extreme pain and convulsing of my upper body. They had to suck blood all the way up to my diaphragm (spelling on that). It took them quite a while to get almost all of it out..enough to stop the pain anyway and my body could take care of the rest. They put one stitch in my ovary and confirmed no endometriosis. I was always worried I had that because of really bad monthly cramps. Anyway...they sucked out over half my blood volume. In other words, I was very close to bleeding out and crashing. Good thing I went in when I did and not later. At that point, it was the scariest thing I had ever gone through in my life. It took me a LONG time to recover from that. Not only from the blood loss and anemia, but the pain of the incision. Where they cut still hurt a year later when I leaned on anything around that area. Yes, I have a scar there...it's not big and no one can really see it. But it bothers me sometimes to this day. Hopefully it will never happen again. They said it was a fluke...an egg that should have released from my ovary didn't, formed a cyst and then later ruptured causing the tear. If it hadn't caused a tear, I would have been fine. Crazy isn't it? So there's the story of my close call and first surgery. The recovery from that was NOT pleasant at all. It was long and difficult. I had to have constant help for the first 2 weeks and therefore stayed in a room at the Ex's aunt and uncles. They took me in and took great care of me. So that's it for today. I'll try to keep up better, but no guarantees. Life happens.

The picture is Rayne at the river...all healed and being silly again.

2 More Weeks

The pins in Rayne's arm get pulled in 2 weeks. I am NOT looking forward to that appointment, but will be glad when her arm is all healed. She's doing really well still and is able to use her hand more. We really started doing more homeschool and she loves it. I had to stop her at 9pm last night and tell her it was time for bed. She wanted to keep going! I can tell you, it's not easy to homeschool her with Quinn though. I like to give her my undivided attention which is when he naps, so when he doesn't nap well, it's kinda difficult. But we are working it out. It's amazing how fast little ones learn and how much they remember. My schooling is going okay. I will be glad when it's something more interesting and actually about Psychology. Okay, I got interrupted a few hundred times during this blog, so I'm quitting now. I guess stay tuned when I can actually finish a thought or sentence or both.

Trying To Hold Her Down

Rayne is feeling much better and I have to really slow her down, which is a good thing. She goes back in for xrays next Tuesday and hopefully everything looks good. She's not having any more pain and is even using her right hand more. We've started doing some school and she seems to like it. She was doing her Math workbook all morning. I wasn't feeling very well today and Quinn was super fussy, so I only got to work with her for a little bit this morning. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I've started school again too, getting the Master's so our schedule is going to be pretty full. We shouldn't be too bored this winter, that's for sure. I think Quinn is more actively teething now, as he is fussier than usual and constantly chomping on his finger while fussing. Even being held doesn't seem to help. I hope he doesn't have too much difficulty with it. He's getting so big. It goes really fast. He's close to sitting up by himself. That's it for tonight..I'm pretty tired.

Really Trying To Stay Sane

Not sure it's working. Rayne is so incredibly whiney and grumpy. It's very difficult to be patient. She keeps crossing that line though of being rude and mean. I hate that she is in pain and bored and yet trying to keep her from being mean and rude to us. Ugh. NO MORE MONKEY BARS EVER!!! That is all.

Poor Broken Rayne

Well..so much for Rayne's first camping experience. We got to the site and set up the tent and bedding and ate dinner and Rayne and her cousins were anxious to get to the playground. My first instinct was to say no, it was getting too late and almost dark, but I let her go with my Sister in Law and her cousins. A little while later I heard her blood curdling scream from all the way at the playground. So I went over there to see what was going on and she was still crying and screaming and my Sister in Law was holding her. I went to get her and looked down and saw her arm just dangling there and looked SO not right. I knew it was broken immediately. I yelled that her arm was broken and what happened? She fell from the monkey bars and landed on her arm. I got her back to the camp site as quickly as possible yelling for someone to help me with her. My Dad finally came out to the road and saw me and I yelled that her arm was broken and we got her back to the site. There was a paramedic not far from our site and he came over and helped get her arm in a makeshift splint and then we got her in the car on my lap in the front to get her to the hospital. When we got there, they took xrays and found out it was dislocated and very badly broken. It would need pins. They didn't have an orthopedic surgeon that could fix her, so we had to drive all the way back home to our hospital. We got in at about 3:30am. She hadn't had any pain meds up to this point. She was a serious trooper. She slept for most of the way there. She finally got a shot of morphine at 4:30. We talked to the surgeon shortly after that and when it was time to go up to pre-op, she was being SO good. She wasn't afraid and was talking and laughing with the nurse and anesthesiologist. They told her where me and Grandma would be (my Mom came with us to help with Quinn). They then started wheeling her away and she didn't cry or anything. I, however, broke down as soon as she was out of sight. Just for a bit. I was scared of the surgery and emotionally drained. I can't believe how much pain she must have been in. The surgery took about an hour and then she slept til about 10:30. I had 2 balloons and gift waiting for her when she woke up. She was happy about that. Once the local wore off she began to be in pain and has been in a quite a bit of pain for the last couple of days, but I think she's getting better. She was much better this evening with just over the counter pain meds. We had great nurses and they had a crib in the room for Quinn and an extra bed for me and my Mom to get some rest. My Mom stayed with us the whole time. She was up for over 24 hours by the time we were released that evening. Then we got home and my Mom unpacked our entire car and most of the clothes and stuff and cleaned up the house a bit before getting a ride home. My Dad stayed behind to finish out the camping trip with Rayne's cousins. Dave fell twice during this whole ordeal and banged up his head pretty good. He's still sore. It was just an awful weekend. But we are thankful it wasn't worse. She says she never wants to go camping again, but I'm sure she'll go sometime. She goes back in on Tuesday to get xrays done to make sure things are healing how they should be. She has 2 pins in her arm and a fiberglass splint all wrapped up. They are hoping the pins will be out in about a month. We are praying that it heals nicely and no need for any more surgery.

No bio this time..just too tired.

Goin Campin

We are off to Wallowa Lake in 1 week. Rayne has never been camping, so I hope she has fun. We are sleeping in a tent..that should be interesting with the baby too. Hopefully it goes well. The weather is supposed to be good..and not 100 degrees...ahhhhhh, that will be nice. I had the great idea of having a stupid yard sale. Yes I said stupid because that's what it was. Stupid. Nuf said. Rayne's cough is much much better. Quinn is doing fine..he chomps down HARD on my finger..like painfully so. I'm guessing he's still teething. Just a wild guess though. I don't think I've blogged since deciding to start a photography biz. I want to do maternity/newborn and children's portraits. So I've been doing a lot of photo sessions for free to build my portfolio. It is so much fun, especially belly and newborn pics. SO my favorite. And I even managed to do a shoot with a very grumpy 3 year old who did NOT want her picture to be taken and come away with several very cute shots of her. So I was happy about that. I am going to upgrade my camera in the next few months hopefully and upgrade my computer to a MAC and get aperature 2 with it. Oh and calibrate my screen so I will be all ready to go pro. I am hoping by February to be full blown pro and charging for sessions. I MIGHT try sooner, but I feel inclined to upgrade my gear first so I can make sure to the best pictures possible. So that's it on the homefront. And now......


THE BIO.

So I had to leave off at where I should have left the ex boyfriend. My brother wasn't doing well..he is still not feeling well, but hopefully slowly getting better. Some people just shouldn't try to climb big tall mountains, ya know? Anyway..so I'm at the point in my bio where you would think I would leave a person that lies and cheats and yet I don't. Instead, I decide to drive 2000 miles to Nashville at the same time he does. We both decide to move there at the same time. Me, to pursue singing..I seriously wanted to. Him, for a business venture that would end in failure. Making a big move like that was not new to me and I always think it's exciting. Until I get there. And then I question my decisions and wonder why I'm so retarded. I guess I should explain how I got to Nashville in the first place. I had a job at Hanford through an employment agency in the human resources department of somewhere...can't remember where. The place is huge. The job was boring. I mean seriously boring. I read at least 20 books while working there. Then I discovered I could get online and that's when I began searching for other jobs. There was a nanny position near Nashville that sounded appealing to me. Of course I already knew that a certain someone was going to be moving there. I figured I would have some support while trying to pursue my singing. That's the one thing he did right. He completely believed in my singing and that I could go somewhere with it. And that was important to me then. So anyway, I contact this person with the ad and we talked and hit it off. She liked me from the phone interview and I got the job. It would include room and board and 150/week. Not a bad deal back then. So I took it and broke the news to my parents that I was once again moving a long ways away from home. I'm sure they were thrilled with me yet again. So I pack up and head out shortly after that. When I arrived at the house I would be living at, it seemed very nice. Very southern which I loved. An older house with lots of charm. The kids were sleeping so I would meet them later. Their Mom seemed really nice. Yeah right. Anyway...we talk for a while and then I go to bed as I am exhausted from a long driving trip. The next morning I get up and meet the girls. They are really cute and it seems like we will all get along great. The girls were 5 and 8. Hard to believe they are now about 15 and 18. Wow. Time goes by fast. So life goes on as normal for a while..I watch the girls during the day and then I'm free in the evening. I think the Mom thought I would just hang out with all of them at night, but I had other ideas. I was there to pursue my singing. I had to get out and do that. I met up with the ex boyfriend and went out singing wherever I could. It was fun. I love singing so I usually have fun when I am doing that. I could tell though that the girls Mom was irritated that I wasn't there in the evening too. Oh well, not much I can do about that. And then one day, I went to a movie in the park with them and when we got home, the Mom asks if I heard her grandparents in the house last night? I said, no were they here? She said..well they died several years ago, but that she thought she heard them in the halls again the night before. I think my mouth must have hit the floor. I thought at first she was kidding..she was not. She continued to tell me that they come out every once in a while and it usually keeps her up. Okay....I want out now. And that's where I will stop. It's late and I'm tired. Next time will continue with this nightmare I've managed to get myself into. And how my health will decline rapidly and end in emergency surgery.

The photo is from my most recent photo shoot.

We are at 80%

Rayne is much better. She still coughs and even has really hard coughs, but not nearly as often. They aren't kidding..it's called a 100 day cough for a reason. It really does last that long. We are only at about 45 days. Longest illness I know of. Quinn's never progressed. He is drooling like crazy though and will choke on it at night and sometimes during the day. Mostly when he is sleeping. I think he might be teething. So I have to listen for him in the monitor and run in there when he chokes. Sometimes I have to lift him up and help him and sometimes, he's okay on his own. He is such a chunk. I bet he weighs at least 16 lbs now. Rayne didn't weight that until she was like a year old!! He can wear 6 month clothes..in part due to his cloth dipes, but he's a chunk too, lol. I'm getting serious about pursuing a photography biz. I really want to do maternity and newborn pics and eventually birth photos when Quinn is older. I can't leave him overnight to do that yet and don't want to take him for obvious reasons. I'm excited to make a go of it. I've got several people lined up to do shoots for to build my portfolio. No pay, but will hopefully pay off when I'm ready to go. I'm excited about the camera I will get with tax return too. Not releasing that info at this point. I love photography so much. It is so creative. So many aspects of creativity to it. And it's so important to people as it captures their loved ones in time. I love candid photography..really capturing people's personalities. I would love to do weddings, but most are on Saturday and that just don't work for me, as I don't work on that day. Maybe someday I will get to do one.

And now...for biography stuff..it's been a while, I know.

So I was leaving Alaska at my last writing. Or typing. I tried to stay on...but the thought of another winter after what I had gone through with those people, was just too much. There were a lot of things I loved about Alaska and I was leaving a dear friend, but I just had to. So I went to the Feast that year in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. That place will always have a somewhat bittersweet feeling for me now. I'm sure you've guessed why. It's because of a man. I met someone at that Feast site. I thought he was different. I'm not sure I want to go into that much. Let's just say I made some bad choices from the time I met him through the next 3 years. Yes, 3 YEARS. This was my first real serious relationship. Before this, I had dated, but not for that long. Man..there are so many things I just don't think I can type out for all to read. I guess some things just have to remain personal and kept locked up. It woudn't do anyone any good to know them or for me to have anyone else know. To sum things up in a nut shell...I met this guy, decide to move to a city in Oregon closer to him, but still quite a drive away. Instead of being 3 states away, he was only 1. So I thought since I met him at the Feast that he was a regular Church goer..don't ever assume this of someone. He in fact had JUST started attending Church again and I don't believe he had any intention of attending regularly. This guy was so mixed up in what he wanted, it was awful. I of course had no idea at the time. So I move to this city with these friends I had also met at the Feast. I stayed with them in their home until I found a job and could afford my own place. These people were also not what they seemed. Especially the woman. She in fact smoked pot at her neighbors regularly and had me watch her son while she did it. I didn't know this right away either. You could say I was a bit naive about the big ole bad world. VERY naive. Living with them was interesting to say the least. It was not fun. While living in that city I worked at a place called National Flora..a teleflora company. The job wasn't bad, I actually enjoyed it. At times it was not easy, like when a grandmother called in for flowers to be sent to her grandchild's funeral. Those were difficult calls. I was to remain composed and compassionate when sometimes it was hard not to cry with the person. Then there were the idiot callers that would spend thousands on roses at Valentines and ask me if I would be impressed if my significant other did that. I actually told a guy I would be very angry if my boyfriend spent that kind of money on some flowers. Stupid. So at that time I lived for the weekends that began by either me or this man traveling to see each other. Little did I know at the time he was still seeing his Ex girlfriend. On the weekends that we couldn't travel and during the week. Nice eh? Not nice at all. And I had no clue. How would I? He lied from the get go to me about a lot of things. It would take me almost a year to find out. And when I did, what did I do? I believed his lies again and gave him another chance. And not just once, but many times. And it wasn't just one girl as I later found out. There was another ex he was seeing too. Doubly nice eh? Can we say STUPID. I wanted it to work so bad, I was just blind to his lies. Seriously...I was so scared that it was my last chance at someone actually caring for me, I closed my eyes to it. And let me tell you, when I opened my eyes again..I was disgusted with myself. Completely. So after moving to his State and living there for 3 months and discovering his side relationships twice while I was there..I finally left. And you would think it was for good wouldn't you? Nope. After that, I moved to Nashville to pursue my singing. Except that he went too..to pursue a business opportunity that would fail. I'm going to leave off here, getting word that my brother isn't doing so hot...gonna go chat with SIL...sorry...stay tuned.

Photo is another friend's daughter...her eyes will getcha

Mending Mending

Rayne is mending. Quinn is still okay. It's been a month this coming Monday since we got the results of Rayne's pertussis test, so Quinn should be in the all clear. For this, we are so so thankful. I cannot even express in words how thankful. He is drooling like crazy, so we are wondering if he is trying to cut teeth already! He also was fussy for a couple of days (can we say crazy Mommy?). He's choking/gasping in his sleep once in a while..not sure if it's saliva or some reflux. He spit up more today than he usually does. Maybe I'm eating something he doesn't like, not sure what it could be though. He's done it twice so far tonight..it's scary. This is going to be a short one tonight, my nerves are frazzled again. More later, goodnight.

The picture is my friend's daughter from a little photo shoot I did.

He's still okay...and Rayne is mending

So far Quinn is still okay, no bad cough. I am so so thankful for that. SOOO thankful. Rayne is healing. She isn't coughing as often or as bad. Sometimes she still has some whooping coughs, but most of them are just a hard cough. I can't tell you how awful this cough is. I will be so glad when Christ returns and all sickness is wiped out forever. I want that to be soon. Like now. Anyway, it's been a bit of a stressful month or so and I could so use a break. But alas, I am a Mommy and there are no true breaks. But that's okay. I am a Mommy and I love it. I am thankful for my children's health right now. And for ours. And for my families. I can't wait until it's okay for us to return to Church. That can't be until the cough is better managed. I don't want her to have a bad attack during services as it would be really disruptive. So we will wait a bit longer. Hopefully another week. So we should be able to order some school supplies later on this month. I'm getting excited to start Rayne on schooling for real. Since the baby has been born, we didn't do much this spring. I think she would really enjoy reading, so we will start working on that. She also loves to add things..she tries. So we will also really focus on that. She loves drawing too, so I can't wait to get some good art supplies for her. She's been drawing tons of pictures for us and her "family" which is of course us, have really long legs, lol. And big heads. not sure what she is trying to say there. AND, everytime she draws us, I am the biggest person in the picture...hmmm...not sure if I should be offended or honored. I'll have to think on that one.

And finally...some more bio stuff

So I was still in Alaska in my last posting. Working for the people who were shams in every way possible. If it wasn't for that little girl, I would have quit a long time before things fell apart. Oh, I forgot, before I started working for them I got a black lab puppy I named Boots. I loved him. He was such a neat dog. He loved to pull kids on sleds, he was always happy to see me. He was fun. Well, with this job and supposedly moving back and forth between Salt Lake and Alaska, it wasn't really going to work to keep him. So I had to give him away. I could never have sold him like a piece of property. There was an employee of theirs that had a son and they were looking for a dog, so I chose them. I cried so hard when I put him in their truck. He tried so hard to get out of the window, he didn't want to go. I know he went to a good home, but it was so hard. I hated it. I wish I would have kept him, because of what eventually happened with the job. So I worked for them all summer, overtime many times, having to cancel my plans I had made for the evening many times. The girls Dad would fly over to Anchorage in his little plane and then if the weather changed too much, he would get stuck over there (how convenient) and if the Mom was out of town, I was stuck until he could get back. Nice right? No relief either. And quite a distance from medical help if I needed it for her. I remember one time in particular, I had a date to go to a movie and dinner and had to cancel at the last minute thanks to him getting stuck over there. I was so very mad. VERY mad. He didn't even care that I had plans, just called and said, sorry I'm stuck, you'll have to stay. What if I refused? What if I just quit? Argh, it bugs me to think about it. I also remember I was with them at a bbq when we heard on the news about Princess Diana being killed. That was weird. Funny the things you remember and what you were doing when they happened. I think that's about all I remember of that job. I learned a lot about caring for someone completely disabled in every way. I loved the little girl, she was so sweet. Plus she loved to hear me sing and a Leanne Rimes song in particular, lol. She got so excited when I started singing that song to her. It was my back pocket tool I brought out when she was having a melt down about something. Those could get pretty hairy. You did NOT want to make her mad. Anyway, it's too bad her parents were losers, because I would have loved to do that job longer. BUT, because they didn't do what they were supposed to and hire another part time nanny to help me, I ended up getting tendinitis in my shoulder and eventually got to where I couldn't lift her by myself. She weighed 70 lbs. I had to go to the doctor because of the pain and I claimed L&I. Guess what they did. They fought it. Claimed it was because of my violin playing. I had already been playing violin for like 20 years and they claimed it was from that, and not lifting her repeatedly day in and day out. They of course lost and had to pay my medical bills, but in return...they left me. Right at the last minute of leaving for Salt Lake, they said they weren't bringing me any longer and they just left. I had no job and no place to live. And THEN, before I could find a new place to live, they shut off the electricity and it had already started getting cold outside and snowed. They didn't even give me a week. I just woke up one day and there was no water and no power. I was SOOOO mad. I had to go stay at a friend's house until I found a roommate to move in with. Nice eh? They just didn't care about anyone but themselves. I think they were abusing their daughter's lawsuit funds. They took the hospital to court because she was disabled from the DTaP vaccine and won, on behalf of their daughter. It was enough to take care of her for the rest of her life. So that's what happened with that job. From there, I tried to stay on in Alaska at a daycare, but when the Feast rolled around, I decided to move out of Alaska. It was just too much for a single woman..I wanted out. And that's where will leave off. The next part of my life was not to get any easier, thanks mostly in part to my stupidity and naivity. Stay tuned....

Never been so scared...

We found out that Rayne has pertussis or whooping cough. It's very horrible to hear your child cough to the point of no more breath and then gasp trying to breathe. Horrible. It's even more horrible to worry that your 3 month old may get a cough like that and have to be hospitalized. When I found out Rayne's pertussis test was positive, I freaked. Big time. And I was in Portland on what was supposed to be a fun trip for Rayne. It ended abruptly with us heading home to get the kids on antibiotics and hoping it was in time before Quinn got that cough. We prayed and have done everything we can holistically and medically and I think he's going to be okay. So far, he doesn't have the cough. I am so praying that he doesn't get it. This illness is so awful. It hides sometimes. That's what I am still worried about. But I know so many are praying and I am just trusting in God to protect him. He's so little. Rayne is recovering..although she still has pretty bad coughing fits. Some still take her breath away and it's still awful. My nieces and nephew have it also and that's what sent little Miette to the hospital one night. This is no disease to mess around with at all. Especially with very young kids. Needless to say, I just don't have it in me to do biography stuff again. It may be a little while. When things can settle down a bit and kids are healthy again.